








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1212 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 360 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Esplay | 13 matches | 1,956 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 117 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5772 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7961 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4484 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5751 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4237 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,314,427 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 865 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Jetta Driver | 44% | 36 |
| #13 | sQuirtmaker | 44% | 78 |
| #14 | Cardoso | 43% | 46 |
| #15 | Arons1 | 38% | 26 |
| #16 | Morten N. | 31% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ig☻r | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Bjorna | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | sQuirtmaker | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | edd. | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Jetta Driver | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elvin | 202 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #2 | sQuirtmaker | 184 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | Cardoso | 180 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #4 | SHIGGAE | 162 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Bjorna | 156 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BotKS | +1.56 | 78 | 72 |
| #2 | ig☻r | +1.38 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | SHIGGAElicious | +1.32 | 61 | 73 |
| #4 | Bjorna | +1.28 | 88 | 58 |
| #5 | SHIGGAE | +1.25 | 60 | 75 |





