








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Esplay | 18 matches | 1,881 | |
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1753 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,626 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2070 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1075 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2488 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 993 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $652,111 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 370 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morten N. | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | not igor | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | SHIGGAE | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | ig☻r | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | Elvin | 57% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ig☻r | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | Elvin | 57% | 37 |
| #6 | BotKS | 55% | 71 |
| #7 | riksen | 46% | 24 |
| #8 | Rsb^ | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BotKS | 9 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | riksen | 5 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | ig☻r | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Elvin | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Rsb^ | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BotKS | 228 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | riksen | 128 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #3 | Morten N. | 50 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | ig☻r | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Elvin | 37 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riksen | +2.87 | 85 | 78 |
| #2 | SHIGGAE | +2.55 | 60 | 74 |
| #3 | BotKS | +0.97 | 76 | 72 |
| #4 | ig☻r | +0.59 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | edd. | +0.59 | 63 | 61 |





