








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 434 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5418 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,244 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3464 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4794 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5496 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4490 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $929,852 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2549 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kukrogn | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | SHIGGAElicious | 61% | 41 |
| #3 | BotKS | 60% | 91 |
| #4 | edd. | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | jEWLEN | 57% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | Gamsty | 47% | 30 |
| #17 | Rsb^ | 46% | 35 |
| #18 | j0nna | 45% | 55 |
| #19 | ClNasty | 45% | 42 |
| #20 | Gabbber | 36% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BotKS | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | jEWLEN | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Elvin | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | SHIGGAE | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Bjorna | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SHIGGAE | 419 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | Elvin | 363 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #3 | BotKS | 300 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | Morten N. | 269 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | Bjorna | 209 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SHIGGAElicious | +1.95 | 59 | 74 |
| #2 | ClNasty | +1.71 | 89 | 66 |
| #3 | ig☻r | +1.41 | 77 | 63 |
| #4 | SHIGGAE | +1.27 | 58 | 73 |
| #5 | Gamsty | +1.24 | 78 | 66 |





