








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 384 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5776 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8314 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7844 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4459 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5833 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,174,655 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L0ngBarrel | 57% | 35 |
| #2 | Portu | 57% | 58 |
| #3 | Drugga | 55% | 104 |
| #4 | bye 👋🙂 | 54% | 85 |
| #5 | Doyl | 51% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Doyl | 51% | 47 |
| #6 | Pooky | 49% | 39 |
| #7 | linK | 47% | 72 |
| #8 | lawz | 45% | 33 |
| #9 | Covie | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bye 👋🙂 | 9 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Drugga | 7 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | linK | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Doyl | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drugga | 400 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | linK | 223 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | lawz | 189 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #4 | Pooky | 144 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | L0ngBarrel | 140 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L0ngBarrel | +3.31 | 90 | 60 |
| #2 | bye 👋🙂 | +0.98 | 84 | 47 |
| #3 | Portu | +0.60 | 78 | 49 |
| #4 | Ryder5k | +0.31 | 69 | 66 |
| #5 | Drugga | +0.01 | 73 | 62 |





