








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1483 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 322 matches | ||
| Faceit | 212 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11636 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,870 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4206 | 16% |
| Smokes | 6729 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 8187 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 7748 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,181,952 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 695 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hölmö❤ | 64% | 45 |
| #2 | Señor Juho | 64% | 196 |
| #3 | JaGzyy | 57% | 380 |
| #4 | Mæh1sk | 56% | 460 |
| #5 | Hauntaa | 56% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Kreisi | 55% | 137 |
| #8 | Lowie | 54% | 501 |
| #9 | aRem | 54% | 84 |
| #10 | jogi | 53% | 400 |
| #11 | Lokki | 47% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaGzyy | 20 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | jogi | 19 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Mæh1sk | 13 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Lowie | 11 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Lokki | 10 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jogi | 1576 | 0.19 | 48 min |
| #2 | JaGzyy | 1343 | 0.17 | 28 min |
| #3 | Lowie | 1268 | 0.12 | 37 min |
| #4 | Mæh1sk | 1221 | 0.13 | 40 min |
| #5 | Kreisi | 772 | 0.26 | 28 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | +3.37 | 89 | 60 |
| #2 | JaGzyy | +1.07 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | Señor Juho | +0.81 | 74 | 60 |
| #4 | Kreisi | +0.46 | 56 | 88 |
| #5 | Lowie | -0.07 | 54 | 74 |





