








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3874 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,696 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6079 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4738 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4807 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4072 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,116,131 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 310 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hölmö❤ | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | Señor Juho | 56% | 108 |
| #3 | JaGzyy | 55% | 217 |
| #4 | Kreisi | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Mæh1sk | 54% | 275 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | JaGzyy | 55% | 217 |
| #4 | Kreisi | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Mæh1sk | 54% | 275 |
| #6 | Lowie | 53% | 252 |
| #7 | aleksi | 53% | 400 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | 26 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | JaGzyy | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Mæh1sk | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Lowie | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Señor Juho | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaGzyy | 777 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | Mæh1sk | 690 | 0.12 | 22 min |
| #3 | Lowie | 641 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #4 | aleksi | 468 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #5 | Señor Juho | 399 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | +3.48 | 88 | 58 |
| #2 | Kreisi | +1.34 | 52 | 87 |
| #3 | JaGzyy | +0.63 | 70 | 60 |
| #4 | Señor Juho | +0.43 | 73 | 58 |
| #5 | Lowie | +0.14 | 53 | 73 |





