








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1591 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 388 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7204 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8966 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6038 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7665 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4004 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,073,360 of utility $69 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hölmö❤ | 61% | 59 |
| #2 | aleksi | 57% | 380 |
| #3 | jogi | 55% | 217 |
| #4 | Señor Juho | 55% | 391 |
| #5 | Mæh1sk | 53% | 525 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | 32 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Mæh1sk | 17 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Lowie | 15 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Señor Juho | 11 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | jogi | 7 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor Juho | 1513 | 0.19 | 39 min |
| #2 | Mæh1sk | 1355 | 0.12 | 44 min |
| #3 | Lowie | 1047 | 0.12 | 33 min |
| #4 | jogi | 842 | 0.18 | 26 min |
| #5 | aleksi | 526 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | +3.48 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | JaGzyy | +1.39 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | Señor Juho | +0.75 | 74 | 62 |
| #4 | Lowie | +0.23 | 54 | 73 |
| #5 | Hölmö❤ | -0.87 | 56 | 53 |





