








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 845 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9884 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 53,760 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12178 | 23% |
| Smokes | 13341 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 13835 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 14406 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,960,070 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | 56% | 460 |
| #2 | Señor Juho | 56% | 438 |
| #3 | jogi | 54% | 275 |
| #4 | JaGzyy | 53% | 525 |
| #5 | NaiKou | 52% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | NaiKou | 52% | 75 |
| #6 | Hölmö❤ | 50% | 293 |
| #7 | Make ツ | 49% | 80 |
| #8 | Lowie | 48% | 485 |
| #9 | CounterShot | 42% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | 33 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | JaGzyy | 24 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Lowie | 16 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Hölmö❤ | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | jogi | 11 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaGzyy | 1890 | 0.17 | 40 min |
| #2 | Señor Juho | 1640 | 0.18 | 43 min |
| #3 | Lowie | 1194 | 0.12 | 37 min |
| #4 | jogi | 1126 | 0.20 | 36 min |
| #5 | aleksi | 596 | 0.06 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | +3.76 | 88 | 61 |
| #2 | JaGzyy | +1.41 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | Señor Juho | +1.33 | 76 | 61 |
| #4 | Lowie | +0.85 | 56 | 72 |
| #5 | Make ツ | -0.40 | 59 | 56 |





