








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 147 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2777 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5389 | 36% |
| Smokes | 3117 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3709 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2712 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $356,991 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WintRy- | 56% | 108 |
| #2 | Lowie | 56% | 122 |
| #3 | aleksi | 55% | 137 |
| #4 | Hauntaa | 55% | 106 |
| #5 | jogi | 54% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Hauntaa | 55% | 106 |
| #5 | jogi | 54% | 48 |
| #6 | TiXu | 49% | 72 |
| #7 | Mæh1sk | 44% | 16 |
| #8 | Kräfi | 30% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WintRy- | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | aleksi | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | jogi | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Lowie | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Hauntaa | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lowie | 281 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | jogi | 143 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | WintRy- | 119 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | aleksi | 111 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | Hauntaa | 71 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aleksi | +2.62 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | Kreisi | +1.58 | 53 | 87 |
| #3 | Lowie | -0.66 | 54 | 74 |
| #4 | Hauntaa | -0.68 | 83 | 55 |
| #5 | WintRy- | -0.76 | 79 | 56 |





