








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
723 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 739 | 30% |
| Smokes | 540 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 566 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 602 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $169,928 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 116 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | ACE MaKKeR | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Schwalbe | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | ✪M!das | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | sчяох | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ViP || Reknown | 50% | 4 |
| #10 | piu_piu | 50% | 4 |
| #11 | sYrOx | 43% | 14 |
| #12 | Clashify | 33% | 6 |
| #13 | lulas | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Clashify | 2 | 0.0179 |
| #2 | sYrOx | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ✪M!das | 1 | 0.0091 |
| #4 | ViP || Reknown | 1 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ACE MaKKeR | 71 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | sчяох | 34 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Raptor46 | 21 | 0.28 | 0 min |
| #4 | ✪M!das | 19 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | sYrOx | 17 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | +4.30 | 58 | 72 |
| #2 | ACE MaKKeR | +1.93 | 75 | 66 |
| #3 | Philton L. | +1.91 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | sчяох | +0.64 | 75 | 55 |
| #5 | Clashify | -0.30 | 93 | 28 |





