








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,962 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1102 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1152 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1506 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1202 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $541,919 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1nter | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | Schwalbe | 50% | 10 |
| #4 | byfahrer | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | Philton L. | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1nter | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | Schwalbe | 50% | 10 |
| #4 | byfahrer | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | Philton L. | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Philton L. | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | byfahrer | 105 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | 63 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | P1nter | 48 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| #4 | Philton L. | 33 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Schwalbe | 9 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1nter | +3.47 | 83 | 51 |
| #2 | byfahrer | +2.49 | 84 | 72 |
| #3 | Philton L. | +2.01 | 83 | 69 |
| #4 | sYrOx | +0.23 | 79 | 63 |
| #5 | ɹǝʇsᴉǝɯƃᴉnɹoz | +0.14 | 65 | 75 |





