








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 131 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 203 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2814 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,694 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2567 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2728 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2557 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1842 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,015,548 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 403 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fabi98 | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | jics | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | ✪ Struitx | 60% | 42 |
| #4 | Foxcry | 59% | 58 |
| #5 | steliokontos | 56% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | ✦ rezzi | 48% | 21 |
| #14 | Mickey シ | 47% | 70 |
| #15 | Gurk 42 | 47% | 43 |
| #16 | Speed | 46% | 26 |
| #17 | AK | 40% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nörte | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Mickey シ | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | ✪ Struitx | 5 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | soLdeC | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Ken | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mickey シ | 674 | 0.47 | 20 min |
| #2 | soLdeC | 292 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ken | 258 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | Nörte | 238 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | Gurk 42 | 232 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mickey シ | +4.01 | 91 | 87 |
| #2 | jics | +2.64 | 85 | 79 |
| #3 | Gurk 42 | +1.95 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | fabi98 | +1.71 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | ✪ Yaska_ | +0.91 | 80 | 63 |





