








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 406 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 117 matches | ||
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Esplay | 22 matches | 1,930 | |
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,555 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2432 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2359 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1979 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1785 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $595,273 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 294 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krydder =DDDD BLM | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | THEaiaN | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | DuuPern | 60% | 35 |
| #4 | ✪DonT | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | Ribo | 58% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapder ff | 344 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #2 | Vestby | 299 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ribo | 227 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #4 | Makrellen | 163 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | ✪DonT | 100 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuuPern | +1.99 | 74 | 58 |
| #2 | ✪DonT | +1.58 | 78 | 64 |
| #3 | krydder =DDDD BLM | +1.46 | 80 | 69 |
| #4 | vakken | +0.83 | 68 | 63 |
| #5 | THEaiaN | +0.70 | 74 | 65 |





