








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1218 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 149 matches | 2,048 | |
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3656 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,576 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3046 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3242 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2976 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3312 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,366,162 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 555 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | DuuPern | 63% | 60 |
| #3 | Makrellen | 58% | 89 |
| #4 | KaZaC | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | ☆Miemora☆ | 54% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ☆Miemora☆ | 54% | 26 |
| #6 | kapder ff | 52% | 104 |
| #7 | vakken | 49% | 99 |
| #8 | Ribo | 45% | 62 |
| #9 | Sander | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapder ff | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | vakken | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Ribo | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | DuuPern | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | KaZaC | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapder ff | 359 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | Makrellen | 300 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ribo | 237 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #4 | vakken | 232 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | DuuPern | 134 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuuPern | +2.14 | 79 | 62 |
| #2 | Makrellen | +1.63 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | vakken | +0.95 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | kapder ff | +0.87 | 74 | 66 |
| #5 | Sander | +0.70 | 57 | 69 |





