








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 710 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 137 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1714 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,376 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1992 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1540 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1644 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1200 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $567,331 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 533 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FN☝👽 | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | Chodu CHakli | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | Dev Panjabi #RoadtoSelfFlashing | 57% | 35 |
| #4 | Burr Chatta | 56% | 27 |
| #5 | side bhay | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Dev Panjabi #RoadtoSelfFlashing | 57% | 35 |
| #4 | Burr Chatta | 56% | 27 |
| #5 | side bhay | 53% | 17 |
| #6 | hoax | 47% | 36 |
| #7 | Raiden #GamingizReal | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dev Panjabi #RoadtoSelfFlashing | 8 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | Raiden #GamingizReal | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Burr Chatta | 4 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | FN☝👽 | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | side bhay | 2 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raiden #GamingizReal | 182 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #2 | side bhay | 60 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | hoax | 51 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Dev Panjabi #RoadtoSelfFlashing | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Chodu CHakli | 21 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lakshya e.e | +4.48 | 69 | 63 |
| #2 | side bhay | +2.57 | 43 | 62 |
| #3 | FN☝👽 | +1.10 | 64 | 35 |
| #4 | Chodu CHakli | -0.35 | 49 | 21 |
| #5 | hoax | -0.80 | 59 | 51 |





