








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 527 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1568 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2115 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1486 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2012 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,717,759 of utility $246 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TYLOO Dank1ng | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | Dspire | 48% | 111 |
| #3 | f u c k | 48% | 258 |
| #4 | Sim | 45% | 245 |
| #5 | SETT _Trading | 45% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TYLOO Dank1ng | +7.38 | 92 | 40 |
| #2 | SETT _Trading | +3.45 | 80 | 43 |
| #3 | Sim | +1.72 | 82 | 60 |
| #4 | f u c k | +1.63 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | Tolman's Totalitarian Creamery | +1.56 | 78 | 42 |





