








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 83 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1705 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,512 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1280 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1367 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1126 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 739 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $290,019 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gamer | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | Krenatööri | 69% | 13 |
| #3 | penultimate | 69% | 16 |
| #4 | Teem | 65% | 26 |
| #5 | 234 | 65% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kermasperma✪-iwnl | 114 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Fawll | 73 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | 234 | 59 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | Teem | 56 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | penultimate | 52 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kermasperma✪-iwnl | +3.64 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | p e r c | +3.58 | 84 | 66 |
| #3 | GEORGEFLOYD69 | +2.33 | 90 | 30 |
| #4 | Krenatööri | +0.85 | 76 | 45 |
| #5 | penultimate | +0.77 | 76 | 77 |





