








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1218 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 413 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6273 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,256 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3985 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5614 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5786 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5871 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,182,406 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 904 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Erosive | 72% | 43 |
| #2 | Sparkyy | 56% | 50 |
| #3 | Cryfix | 55% | 80 |
| #4 | Schnegge_V3 | 55% | 33 |
| #5 | Jul1an | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | MrKirbyå¹øć | 45% | 40 |
| #14 | TubeYou | 44% | 87 |
| #15 | xelfeR | 41% | 127 |
| #16 | Jaraa | 41% | 37 |
| #17 | Chris | 34% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Demmi | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | DeiraCity | 6 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Sl3Dge98 DiNase | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | LeBron James | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | TubeYou | 5 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Demmi | 1654 | 0.40 | 48 min |
| #2 | Sl3Dge98 DiNase | 699 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #3 | LeBron James | 345 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | s a n s eā ā ā | 251 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | Cryfix | 237 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Erosive | +4.89 | 94 | 66 |
| #2 | Sparkyy | +3.07 | 82 | 66 |
| #3 | MrKirbyå¹øć | +1.85 | 72 | 76 |
| #4 | Jul1an | +1.62 | 68 | 59 |
| #5 | xelfeR | +1.18 | 76 | 63 |





