








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 336 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 783 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 128 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7440 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,852 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7631 | 21% |
| Smokes | 13583 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 6929 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 7709 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,536,562 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HxRL | 55% | 58 |
| #2 | t0ro | 53% | 98 |
| #3 | Nozza | 53% | 95 |
| #4 | Joon_Jon ジュンジョン | 50% | 450 |
| #5 | ✪MATHIAS | 50% | 412 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | JustGary | 48% | 122 |
| #8 | Spartan | 47% | 116 |
| #9 | ASmoothCriminal | 47% | 159 |
| #10 | Fencer1223 | 43% | 63 |
| #11 | ✨ Luz | 42% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joon_Jon ジュンジョン | 13 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Sweet Beef | 5 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | ASmoothCriminal | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | t0ro | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | ✪MATHIAS | 4 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweet Beef | 1104 | 0.12 | 26 min |
| #2 | Joon_Jon ジュンジョン | 966 | 0.10 | 21 min |
| #3 | ✨ Luz | 487 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #4 | JustGary | 369 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #5 | ✪MATHIAS | 342 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joon_Jon ジュンジョン | +3.02 | 69 | 62 |
| #2 | ✨ Luz | +2.33 | 87 | 60 |
| #3 | Whippopotamus | -0.17 | 60 | 70 |
| #4 | Sweet Beef | -0.20 | 58 | 63 |
| #5 | JustGary | -0.40 | 71 | 67 |





