








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 76 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1475 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,627 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1381 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1105 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1691 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1450 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $481,346 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 905 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Notcock | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | just Andooby | 55% | 130 |
| #3 | obm | 55% | 87 |
| #4 | Shadow Prime | 54% | 50 |
| #5 | TonkaTruck | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k4rmaa | 17 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Tspencer | 13 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | just Andooby | 10 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | obm | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Shadow Prime | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | just Andooby | 457 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | k4rmaa | 428 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #3 | obm | 284 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | danwill77 | 214 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Tspencer | 200 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tspencer | +2.89 | 77 | 57 |
| #2 | Notcock | +2.50 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | k4rmaa | +1.94 | 82 | 60 |
| #4 | Shadow Prime | +1.31 | 58 | 68 |
| #5 | obm | +0.95 | 61 | 64 |





