








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2395 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,180 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2506 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2401 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2156 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2117 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $705,433 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 290 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tspencer | 58% | 116 |
| #2 | Notcock | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | sadgezone | 54% | 50 |
| #4 | k4rmaa | 52% | 232 |
| #5 | just Andooby | 51% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k4rmaa | 25 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Tspencer | 20 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | obm | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | just Andooby | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | TonkaTruck | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k4rmaa | 759 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #2 | just Andooby | 585 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #3 | obm | 403 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | Tspencer | 298 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | danwill77 | 160 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tspencer | +1.97 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | k4rmaa | +1.33 | 82 | 62 |
| #3 | Shadow Prime | +0.79 | 63 | 65 |
| #4 | obm | -0.20 | 62 | 65 |
| #5 | just Andooby | -0.84 | 59 | 60 |





