








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2296 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 234 matches | ||
| Faceit | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




107 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11622 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5197 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5588 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 6646 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 7178 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,916,453 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2284 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crytec | 71% | 181 |
| #2 | meta | 67% | 48 |
| #3 | CR4X | 65% | 55 |
| #4 | w1tcher | 64% | 76 |
| #5 | WapBap1Tap | 64% | 237 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | flPP | 59% | 90 |
| #10 | ^hNe | 59% | 169 |
| #11 | psyko1 | 54% | 57 |
| #12 | Denem | 51% | 47 |
| #13 | derkenner02 | 46% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WapBap1Tap | 43 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Crytec | 25 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | ツ | 17 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | ^hNe | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | derkenner02 | 7 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^hNe | 503 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | Crytec | 335 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #3 | flPP | 290 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #4 | derkenner02 | 267 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | WapBap1Tap | 263 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crytec | +3.37 | 88 | 59 |
| #2 | 1fallsbimsl david.exe | +3.26 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | w1tcher | +2.72 | 84 | 72 |
| #4 | 𝖘𝖜𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍- | +1.64 | 79 | 38 |
| #5 | meta | +1.49 | 75 | 75 |





