










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1192 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,698 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1508 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1333 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 958 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 899 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $182,546 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 754 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shinra | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | NilseerN | 68% | 25 |
| #3 | Smokier_ | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | sev | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | pog | 58% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | H3gglund | 42% | 12 |
| #16 | røbergツ | 38% | 13 |
| #17 | Mr. Coolmayo | 33% | 6 |
| #18 | Borgan | 33% | 6 |
| #19 | الضل SKN | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pog | 4 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | von1z | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | NilseerN | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Hulk | 2 | 0.0083 |
| #5 | Mr. Coolmayo | 2 | 0.0183 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zeny | 140 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #2 | pog | 85 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | von1z | 60 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | الضل SKN | 60 | 0.41 | 1 min |
| #5 | NilseerN | 56 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VOXEL | +1.68 | 74 | 72 |
| #2 | NilseerN | +1.65 | 74 | 72 |
| #3 | von1z | +0.81 | 71 | 71 |
| #4 | Hulk | +0.80 | 86 | 42 |
| #5 | pog | +0.69 | 59 | 67 |





