








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 521 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 243 matches | ||
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4029 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,689 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3045 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3523 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3796 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3325 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,350,479 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | havn | 64% | 112 |
| #2 | kZ | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | ff | 58% | 314 |
| #4 | wallen | 57% | 184 |
| #5 | Indonation | 54% | 142 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Indonation | 54% | 142 |
| #6 | prNsfw | 54% | 144 |
| #7 | EPSKY | 53% | 230 |
| #8 | amky | 53% | 96 |
| #9 | red pepper Nunnus | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ff | 16 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | wallen | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Indonation | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | prNsfw | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | amky | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ff | 1049 | 0.15 | 26 min |
| #2 | EPSKY | 969 | 0.20 | 23 min |
| #3 | wallen | 591 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #4 | prNsfw | 573 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #5 | Indonation | 467 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kZ | +3.41 | 78 | 72 |
| #2 | havn | +3.38 | 91 | 62 |
| #3 | ff | +1.31 | 72 | 68 |
| #4 | amky | +1.20 | 83 | 60 |
| #5 | EPSKY | +0.51 | 68 | 68 |





