








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 245 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 165 matches | ||
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4313 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2907 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4424 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2463 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3701 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $840,823 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 137 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wallen | 65% | 184 |
| #2 | charlie | 64% | 112 |
| #3 | RustY | 64% | 25 |
| #4 | Indonation | 61% | 102 |
| #5 | ff | 60% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ff | 60% | 238 |
| #6 | red pepper Nunnus | 60% | 20 |
| #7 | EPSKY | 60% | 239 |
| #8 | amky | 59% | 58 |
| #9 | prNsfw | 57% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ff | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | EPSKY | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | prNsfw | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Indonation | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | RustY | 2 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EPSKY | 934 | 0.18 | 23 min |
| #2 | ff | 705 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #3 | wallen | 576 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #4 | prNsfw | 513 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #5 | Indonation | 255 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | havn | +3.19 | 91 | 62 |
| #2 | amky | +0.88 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | ff | +0.67 | 74 | 65 |
| #4 | RustY | +0.58 | 70 | 69 |
| #5 | wallen | +0.20 | 70 | 65 |





