








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 842 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1374 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 889 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1111 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $409,145 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skruubz | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Fredrick™ | 67% | 39 |
| #3 | owen | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | sharp | 56% | 122 |
| #5 | MrFailology | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | owen | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | sharp | 56% | 122 |
| #5 | MrFailology | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | s c r a p s | 50% | 22 |
| #7 | kowalskey | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharp | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Fredrick™ | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | owen | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | MrFailology | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | skruubz | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharp | 309 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | owen | 78 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #3 | skruubz | 78 | 0.34 | 2 min |
| #4 | Fredrick™ | 68 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | MrFailology | 67 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skruubz | +4.20 | 81 | 88 |
| #2 | sharp | +2.35 | 85 | 63 |
| #3 | owen | +1.70 | 77 | 57 |
| #4 | Fredrick™ | +1.01 | 76 | 56 |
| #5 | MrFailology | +0.79 | 74 | 68 |





