








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1089 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 424 matches | ||
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6726 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,802 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5816 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5986 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7541 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 6459 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,582,866 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | VillyMaximus | 53% | 223 |
| #5 | guldberggay | 53% | 137 |
| #6 | Kyyyhl | 51% | 292 |
| #7 | dɐni | 51% | 387 |
| #8 | General Figglebottom | 46% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CLOUT | +4.61 | 91 | 75 |
| #2 | Mimosa x Cherrytini | +2.95 | 77 | 68 |
| #3 | dɐni | +1.73 | 64 | 66 |
| #4 | VillyMaximus | +0.67 | 68 | 69 |
| #5 | Wizlip | +0.62 | 62 | 63 |





