








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 504 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2181 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,726 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2002 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2266 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1622 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 836 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $709,120 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oSeЯft | 15 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | EzArne | 14 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Dr. med. Klatsch Mayer | 13 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Schwanzlurch | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Tschan-old | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EzArne | 592 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #2 | Dr. med. Klatsch Mayer | 254 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | Schwanzlurch | 200 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Minospikruski | 122 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | oSeЯft | 119 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Minospikruski | +3.98 | 44 | 76 |
| #2 | Tschan-old | +1.40 | 72 | 70 |
| #3 | EzArne | +1.11 | 60 | 74 |
| #4 | oSeЯft | +1.05 | 76 | 45 |
| #5 | tokkyu | +0.24 | 63 | 57 |





