








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1528 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 579 matches | ||
| Faceit | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9681 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,022 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7103 | 22% |
| Smokes | 8521 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7804 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 8594 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,842,361 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juantonio | 61% | 137 |
| #2 | Nkae | 60% | 100 |
| #3 | brady | 59% | 74 |
| #4 | DETER | 59% | 148 |
| #5 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | 58% | 299 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | moRrow | 55% | 88 |
| #11 | Cartman | 53% | 60 |
| #12 | Warlock | 53% | 180 |
| #13 | Lazarus | 52% | 58 |
| #14 | Dr.Phil | 51% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | d!ce. | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | SneakyKid | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Warlock | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | DETER | 4 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | 1287 | 0.21 | 37 min |
| #2 | SneakyKid | 600 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #3 | Juantonio | 542 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #4 | Warlock | 495 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #5 | moRrow | 437 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | +2.70 | 81 | 76 |
| #2 | Nkae | +1.99 | 85 | 69 |
| #3 | Juantonio | +0.86 | 61 | 72 |
| #4 | DETER | +0.78 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | Fragmints | +0.77 | 79 | 72 |





