








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1439 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 289 matches | ||
| Faceit | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 225 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10880 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,557 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8220 | 24% |
| Smokes | 9813 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6948 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 9576 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,889,656 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 548 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Nkae | 59% | 92 |
| #7 | ems | 57% | 250 |
| #8 | moRrow | 49% | 191 |
| #9 | brady | 47% | 76 |
| #10 | meowie | 46% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moRrow | 18 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | 14 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | DETER | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Juantonio | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | meowie | 7 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | 1613 | 0.20 | 45 min |
| #2 | Juantonio | 1157 | 0.18 | 27 min |
| #3 | moRrow | 922 | 0.24 | 28 min |
| #4 | Dr.Phil | 578 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #5 | ems | 483 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARKO-1[5lyfe] | +2.62 | 86 | 76 |
| #2 | SneakyKid | +2.12 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | Nkae | +1.83 | 85 | 69 |
| #4 | Juantonio | +1.60 | 67 | 73 |
| #5 | brady | +1.32 | 80 | 68 |





