








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 336 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2452 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,534 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3522 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2490 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3034 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2488 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,110,286 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 307 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | despotz | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | soupisfood | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | Serano | 50% | 149 |
| #4 | Abu Nasir | 49% | 182 |
| #5 | fro | 49% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Abu Nasir | 49% | 182 |
| #5 | fro | 49% | 170 |
| #6 | vestibiulis | 47% | 180 |
| #7 | ElNinoJESUS- | 46% | 78 |
| #8 | soupisfood | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abu Nasir | 39 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | vestibiulis | 25 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | fro | 25 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | soupisfood | 10 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | Serano | 9 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abu Nasir | 627 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | vestibiulis | 350 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | Serano | 299 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | fro | 224 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | soupisfood | 198 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soupisfood | +2.59 | 70 | 60 |
| #2 | soupisfood | +2.45 | 71 | 72 |
| #3 | Serano | +1.83 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | vestibiulis | +1.54 | 68 | 76 |
| #5 | Abu Nasir | +1.45 | 77 | 65 |





