










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 389 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 220 matches | ||
| Faceit | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 63 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6353 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,560 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10688 | 31% |
| Smokes | 9898 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 6727 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 7247 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $500,221 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 734 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Just Coala | 59% | 32 |
| #9 | Ode | 59% | 475 |
| #10 | andreui | 59% | 34 |
| #11 | kETKU | 54% | 322 |
| #12 | Uskomaton Tappokone | 52% | 309 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ode | 15 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | keijuls | 14 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | tomtom | 8 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | tj | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | kETKU | 5 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kETKU | 1190 | 0.18 | 39 min |
| #2 | Ode | 1158 | 0.12 | 34 min |
| #3 | keijuls | 1071 | 0.10 | 32 min |
| #4 | Uskomaton Tappokone | 436 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #5 | tj | 403 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | keijuls | +2.09 | 75 | 73 |
| #2 | SUS1 | +1.92 | 80 | 72 |
| #3 | Ode | +1.18 | 69 | 75 |
| #4 | Gold Digger | +0.99 | 64 | 76 |
| #5 | kETKU | +0.95 | 68 | 73 |





