








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 420 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3140 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,012 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1634 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1596 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1514 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1268 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,577,621 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | I WRESTLE WITH MANLY CREATURES | 50% | 20 |
| #8 | lil missekat | 49% | 164 |
| #9 | ButterCup Snusaim | 48% | 60 |
| #10 | KarstenKantsten | 48% | 147 |
| #11 | ✪ Ham_Der_Dao ✪ | 43% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil missekat | 28 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | KarstenKantsten | 19 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Young Dev1ceツ | 18 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Kapperladen | 11 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | moew moew | 7 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil missekat | 352 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | KarstenKantsten | 308 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Young Dev1ceツ | 272 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | moew moew | 188 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kapperladen | 184 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kapperladen | +1.88 | 81 | 46 |
| #2 | I WRESTLE WITH MANLY CREATURES | +1.77 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | Supreme-Leader | +1.54 | 59 | 50 |
| #4 | KarstenKantsten | +0.57 | 74 | 64 |
| #5 | moew moew | -0.17 | 63 | 59 |





