








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 235 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 139 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3008 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,657 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2649 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2717 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1965 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2326 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $755,822 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Patrón | 83% | 23 |
| #2 | Str0ke- | 70% | 43 |
| #3 | ✪︎ StyriX | 68% | 31 |
| #4 | seka4a | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | Skyfusion | 63% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ................... | 61% | 28 |
| #7 | Mafiota | 60% | 107 |
| #8 | HadesA | 58% | 65 |
| #9 | Paco Di Bango â™› â™› â™› | 57% | 28 |
| #10 | R1 | 56% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mafiota | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | R1 | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Skyfusion | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | El Patrón | 2 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | HadesA | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mafiota | 358 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | Skyfusion | 321 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | HadesA | 170 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | ✪︎ StyriX | 117 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Str0ke- | 110 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Str0ke- | +4.43 | 90 | 66 |
| #2 | seka4a | +3.15 | 98 | 56 |
| #3 | Skyfusion | +1.39 | 75 | 66 |
| #4 | R1 | +1.38 | 80 | 65 |
| #5 | Mafiota | +1.02 | 84 | 65 |





