








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 45 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1035 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,619 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 880 | 34% |
| Smokes | 691 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 481 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 567 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $333,934 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 62 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🆂🆄🆁🅵🅰🅲🅴 | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | Billie | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Loca | 45% | 22 |
| #4 | ads | 41% | 87 |
| #5 | Mr. Blue | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🆂🆄🆁🅵🅰🅲🅴 | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | Billie | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Loca | 45% | 22 |
| #4 | ads | 41% | 87 |
| #5 | Mr. Blue | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ads | 12 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | Mr. Blue | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Billie | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Loca | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ads | 108 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | Mr. Blue | 32 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Billie | 29 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Loca | 25 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | 🆂🆄🆁🅵🅰🅲🅴 | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Loca | +6.96 | 97 | 54 |
| #2 | Billie | +2.42 | 82 | 33 |
| #3 | Mr. Merlin | -0.33 | 67 | 51 |
| #4 | ads | -0.51 | 59 | 42 |
| #5 | 🆂🆄🆁🅵🅰🅲🅴 | -0.92 | 67 | 28 |





