








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1033 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 317 matches | ||
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8212 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9177 | 35% |
| Smokes | 5953 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4314 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 6634 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,706,220 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rijyn | 68% | 71 |
| #2 | .year | 65% | 48 |
| #3 | Der1vative | 60% | 58 |
| #4 | Ric Flair Drip | 57% | 252 |
| #5 | ContractKilla | 56% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Ric Flair Drip | 57% | 252 |
| #5 | ContractKilla | 56% | 57 |
| #6 | Avenging_Goose | 56% | 75 |
| #7 | N4i | 56% | 43 |
| #8 | King Bob | 55% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ric Flair Drip | 22 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | King Bob | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | rijyn | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Der1vative | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | N4i | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ric Flair Drip | 1530 | 0.29 | 36 min |
| #2 | Avenging_Goose | 344 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | Der1vative | 281 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | King Bob | 249 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | ContractKilla | 202 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Der1vative | +2.63 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | Avenging_Goose | +2.39 | 92 | 60 |
| #3 | N4i | +2.06 | 90 | 62 |
| #4 | rijyn | +1.78 | 87 | 65 |
| #5 | Ric Flair Drip | +1.48 | 81 | 62 |





