








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 437 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1479 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2729 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1115 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1039 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1443 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $509,680 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WidePeak | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | never lucky | 56% | 9 |
| #3 | Raquez | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | DerGooglehupf | Marcell | 54% | 87 |
| #5 | silex | 50% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | silex | 50% | 80 |
| #6 | Calisto | 47% | 53 |
| #7 | Yasch | 43% | 51 |
| #8 | BeefB3ast | 42% | 12 |
| #9 | Operator | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DerGooglehupf | Marcell | 20 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Raquez | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | WidePeak | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | BeefB3ast | 3 | 0.0109 |
| #5 | silex | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DerGooglehupf | Marcell | 307 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | silex | 196 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | Raquez | 190 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #4 | Yasch | 145 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | Calisto | 125 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raquez | +2.33 | 89 | 69 |
| #2 | silex | +2.04 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | ToXicZ | +0.76 | 75 | 73 |
| #4 | DerGooglehupf | Marcell | +0.34 | 66 | 59 |
| #5 | WidePeak | +0.23 | 56 | 58 |





