








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 88 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2332 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,137 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1701 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2546 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1436 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1454 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $672,285 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Batman | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | ZOOTIEZ | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | Silentbaws | 57% | 106 |
| #4 | DragonRc | 55% | 126 |
| #5 | Brixsy | 52% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Silentbaws | 57% | 106 |
| #4 | DragonRc | 55% | 126 |
| #5 | Brixsy | 52% | 88 |
| #6 | Krisis | 52% | 181 |
| #7 | Gragoon | 45% | 147 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krisis | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Gragoon | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Silentbaws | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | DragonRc | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Brixsy | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gragoon | 317 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #2 | Krisis | 294 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #3 | DragonRc | 187 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Silentbaws | 107 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Brixsy | 101 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Silentbaws | +1.42 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | DragonRc | +1.09 | 73 | 54 |
| #3 | Krisis | +1.08 | 64 | 55 |
| #4 | ZOOTIEZ | +0.03 | 78 | 63 |
| #5 | Gragoon | -0.10 | 75 | 65 |





