








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 547 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 141 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3185 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,042 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2485 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1882 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2625 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3050 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,013,162 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whale | 73% | 74 |
| #2 | Thomas Shelby | 69% | 113 |
| #3 | Jackfwaust | 68% | 38 |
| #4 | lil mugga | 68% | 116 |
| #5 | Payru | 67% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | lil mugga | 68% | 116 |
| #5 | Payru | 67% | 165 |
| #6 | pz | 58% | 19 |
| #7 | String Bean | 56% | 16 |
| #8 | katalyst der Gott | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jackfwaust | 8 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | Payru | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Whale | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | lil mugga | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Thomas Shelby | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whale | 569 | 0.36 | 15 min |
| #2 | Payru | 423 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | lil mugga | 288 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Jackfwaust | 196 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #5 | Thomas Shelby | 129 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmartAsSuperman | +2.91 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | Whale | +2.41 | 79 | 79 |
| #3 | Thomas Shelby | +1.96 | 84 | 58 |
| #4 | Payru | +0.60 | 77 | 58 |
| #5 | pz | +0.08 | 75 | 70 |





