








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 560 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2823 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,125 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3341 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3163 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1594 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2027 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $710,648 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1325 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iiro | 73% | 26 |
| #2 | sleepyx | 72% | 18 |
| #3 | Julma-Osuja | 66% | 29 |
| #4 | SenZeJ | 60% | 43 |
| #5 | Sep | 60% | 199 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | lihapulla27 | 59% | 37 |
| #7 | Torkuttaja | 59% | 29 |
| #8 | Sofail | 58% | 81 |
| #9 | Kääbik | 53% | 156 |
| #10 | WileX | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kääbik | 14 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Sep | 10 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Sofail | 9 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | WileX | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | Torkuttaja | 5 | 0.0087 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kääbik | 479 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #2 | Sep | 433 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | Sofail | 278 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #4 | Torkuttaja | 78 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | SenZeJ | 77 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sleepyx | +2.91 | 84 | 70 |
| #2 | Sofail | +2.30 | 81 | 77 |
| #3 | Sep | +2.24 | 88 | 63 |
| #4 | Kääbik | +2.12 | 88 | 67 |
| #5 | jääkuubik | +0.85 | 79 | 64 |





