








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 438 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 345 matches | ||
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4877 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,695 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7446 | 38% |
| Smokes | 4643 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3373 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4233 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $700,868 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 636 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | TheLastDon | 48% | 220 |
| #9 | StarBoi | 47% | 94 |
| #10 | water | 46% | 59 |
| #11 | Huck | 44% | 27 |
| #12 | Hoid | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheLastDon | 691 | 0.15 | 20 min |
| #2 | StarBoi | 365 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | kAppz | 359 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #4 | water | 207 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | Supine | 197 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Archy | +3.94 | 86 | 49 |
| #2 | Supine | +1.21 | 69 | 74 |
| #3 | PAS | +1.19 | 76 | 66 |
| #4 | Demonsar | +0.76 | 52 | 55 |
| #5 | StarBoi | +0.44 | 66 | 69 |





