








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1378 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7722 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7325 | 28% |
| Smokes | 8118 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4924 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 6243 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,270,898 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鳴子しょうきち | 61% | 199 |
| #2 | 小野田さかみち. | 58% | 79 |
| #3 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | 55% | 263 |
| #4 | KAGA | 53% | 139 |
| #5 | DavisWai | 51% | 228 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | DavisWai | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Ice-Cream Man | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | 鳴子しょうきち | 8 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | BonoZzz | 7 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BonoZzz | 2001 | 0.18 | 54 min |
| #2 | 鳴子しょうきち | 689 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #3 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | 682 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #4 | DavisWai | 358 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | 菜就多吃 | 339 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鳴子しょうきち | +4.91 | 70 | 65 |
| #2 | 小野田さかみち. | +3.77 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | BonoZzz | +2.26 | 69 | 69 |
| #4 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | +2.11 | 37 | 42 |
| #5 | CrossJai2 | +2.04 | 73 | 60 |





