








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 701 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 54 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3510 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,265 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2585 | 16% |
| Smokes | 5867 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3728 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4085 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,063,077 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鳴子しょうきち | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | 小野田さかみち. | 47% | 34 |
| #3 | DavisWai | 46% | 164 |
| #4 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | 46% | 126 |
| #5 | 菜就多吃 | 45% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鳴子しょうきち | +5.40 | 74 | 63 |
| #2 | 小野田さかみち. | +4.88 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | BonoZzz | +3.63 | 72 | 73 |
| #4 | Hasta La Vista, Baby | +3.59 | 32 | 48 |
| #5 | CrossJai2 | +3.00 | 77 | 60 |





