








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 488 | 26% |
| Smokes | 385 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 504 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 508 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $118,914 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jens Varmmand | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Doctor Quanix | 75% | 24 |
| #3 | G1vskov | 73% | 15 |
| #4 | Crazy xD | 63% | 46 |
| #5 | Anders | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jens Varmmand | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Doctor Quanix | 75% | 24 |
| #3 | G1vskov | 73% | 15 |
| #4 | Crazy xD | 63% | 46 |
| #5 | Anders | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crazy xD | 9 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | Doctor Quanix | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | G1vskov | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Anders | 1 | 0.0132 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crazy xD | 221 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #2 | G1vskov | 64 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | Doctor Quanix | 30 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jens Varmmand | 7 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Anders | 5 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G1vskov | +3.11 | 73 | 76 |
| #2 | Crazy xD | +2.81 | 79 | 79 |
| #3 | Doctor Quanix | +2.20 | 86 | 73 |
| #4 | Jens Varmmand | +1.73 | 82 | 79 |
| #5 | Anders | -0.58 | 51 | 34 |





