








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 181 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2308 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,922 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1393 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1773 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1050 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1706 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $570,882 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 777_Kewa_777 | 91% | 11 |
| #2 | F3tthai (*-*)/ | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Luis | 69% | 26 |
| #4 | Sir Gilbert | 65% | 37 |
| #5 | ✪ keanuS- | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | IronTony | 53% | 19 |
| #14 | Sulin | 52% | 33 |
| #15 | dat_örnie | 50% | 10 |
| #16 | 5ch0lli | 50% | 24 |
| #17 | aЯT. | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ keanuS- | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #2 | 5ch0lli | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | IronTony | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Luis | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Alb0r | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5ch0lli | 187 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | Sulin | 156 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | Sir Gilbert | 149 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | betoooo0ooo | 144 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | Luis | 134 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F3tthai (*-*)/ | +2.29 | 87 | 70 |
| #2 | Sir Gilbert | +2.10 | 78 | 63 |
| #3 | 1dlesniper | +1.71 | 79 | 80 |
| #4 | Yuno | +1.52 | 78 | 58 |
| #5 | 777_Kewa_777 | +1.50 | 83 | 54 |





