








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 538 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 173 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2187 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,522 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1809 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2683 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3036 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2994 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,728,742 of utility $271 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 376 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Core 2009 | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Jako™ | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | George W. Ku$h | 61% | 46 |
| #4 | Peugeot 205 Forever 1.1 1994 | 56% | 34 |
| #5 | j0di | 55% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0di | 10 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | aKra! | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | George W. Ku$h | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Peugeot 205 Forever 1.1 1994 | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | Krizti | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Core 2009 | +3.43 | 63 | 52 |
| #2 | Krizti | +2.79 | 75 | 41 |
| #3 | Peugeot 205 Forever 1.1 1994 | +2.46 | 73 | 65 |
| #4 | j0di | +2.41 | 68 | 78 |
| #5 | DoDo | +1.85 | 84 | 73 |





