








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2287 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 569 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,669 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 90 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,731 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10153 | 28% |
| Smokes | 10685 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7989 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 7904 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,363,752 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1672 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Lusti | 43% | 221 |
| #12 | nikoh | 43% | 119 |
| #13 | S4imxn | 43% | 227 |
| #14 | viliho | 42% | 111 |
| #15 | ᴿäˢäⁿᵉⁿ | 37% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S4imxn | 25 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Lusti | 12 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | nikoh | 12 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Samsuy | 10 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | haramAkhim | 10 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S4imxn | 1218 | 0.26 | 31 min |
| #2 | z4ico | 775 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #3 | Lusti | 686 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #4 | Samsuy | 517 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #5 | 76561199544132077 | 333 | 0.06 | 5 min |





