








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2620 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,473 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 851 | 9% |
| Smokes | 4491 | 47% |
| HE Grenades | 2106 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2025 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $394,684 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reflexx | 75% | 32 |
| #2 | ASK YO GIRL ABT ME | 69% | 35 |
| #3 | Gustaf | 67% | 27 |
| #4 | FaZe Dougy | 64% | 28 |
| #5 | 5:4 Reggie | 62% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | BusterCherry | 56% | 18 |
| #12 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | 50% | 30 |
| #13 | space man | 45% | 20 |
| #14 | Nutout | 43% | 37 |
| #15 | Pickle | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nutout | 18 | 0.0333 |
| #2 | reflexx | 13 | 0.0241 |
| #3 | Abdu Rozik | 11 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | 5:4 Reggie | 8 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | 7 | 0.0138 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | 95 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #2 | reflexx | 89 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | 5:4 Reggie | 75 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | JesusChrist | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Nutout | 53 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | +2.56 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | reflexx | +2.40 | 87 | 66 |
| #3 | 5:4 Reggie | +2.25 | 82 | 51 |
| #4 | Felix | +2.13 | 66 | 59 |
| #5 | Gustaf | +1.11 | 56 | 48 |





