








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 547 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 330 matches | ||
| Faceit | 240 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




171 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10879 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,473 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11687 | 29% |
| Smokes | 12075 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6321 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 10390 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,281,227 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 934 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brad | 56% | 322 |
| #2 | Sundown | 54% | 349 |
| #3 | Milzzy | 53% | 128 |
| #4 | kudo | 53% | 149 |
| #5 | Tutel | 52% | 151 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Tutel | 52% | 151 |
| #6 | zyk0 | 51% | 96 |
| #7 | Pain | 51% | 156 |
| #8 | FreshMeatForDays | 45% | 134 |
| #9 | Nay | 34% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sundown | 54 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Pain | 34 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | brad | 20 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Tutel | 14 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | FreshMeatForDays | 11 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sundown | 1575 | 0.22 | 41 min |
| #2 | brad | 1094 | 0.17 | 30 min |
| #3 | Tutel | 616 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #4 | Milzzy | 461 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #5 | kudo | 443 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sundown | +2.30 | 83 | 70 |
| #2 | Grubb | +1.52 | 63 | 67 |
| #3 | brad | +1.47 | 90 | 59 |
| #4 | Pain | +1.17 | 81 | 45 |
| #5 | zyk0 | +0.72 | 72 | 64 |





