








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 809 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Faceit | 169 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




115 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8209 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,603 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10767 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7724 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5362 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5750 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,514,295 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1489 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zyk0 | 69% | 39 |
| #2 | kudo | 57% | 105 |
| #3 | brad | 57% | 289 |
| #4 | Pain | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | Tutel | 56% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Tutel | 56% | 209 |
| #6 | Grubb | 54% | 349 |
| #7 | Milzzy | 46% | 63 |
| #8 | Nay | 45% | 292 |
| #9 | FreshMeatForDays | 44% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grubb | 50 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Tutel | 21 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | brad | 17 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | FreshMeatForDays | 17 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | Nay | 14 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grubb | 1507 | 0.21 | 37 min |
| #2 | brad | 1005 | 0.17 | 28 min |
| #3 | Tutel | 810 | 0.19 | 21 min |
| #4 | FreshMeatForDays | 481 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #5 | kudo | 304 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sundown | +3.20 | 84 | 70 |
| #2 | brad | +2.39 | 91 | 59 |
| #3 | Pain | +1.89 | 78 | 36 |
| #4 | Grubb | +1.36 | 61 | 68 |
| #5 | Tutel | +0.86 | 82 | 72 |





